Vauxhall Astra VXR

I grew up in the nineties. In my formative car years, 276bhp was a very significant and evocative figure; the unspoken power-cap agreed by the major Japanese manufacturers, if you saw an Impreza, Skyline or RX-7 in the Gran Turismo showroom next to the magic 2-7-6, you knew that it was probably packing 300bhp+.

So it's an unusual feeling for someone of my age to see this ethereal figure applied to a Vauxhall Astra. That's a souped-up shopping hatch, no?
Well, no - Vauxhall won't let you get away with that. The Astra VXR is a coupé, and they won't hear otherwise. (This is to place it in competition with other hatchbacks that claim to be sporty coupés, such as the VW Scirocco...)
It's actually quite an impressive proposition: the spec reads off like a 1990s Max Power wet dream - 20" wheels, a massive turbo, a top speed of 155mph, Brembo brakes, an LSD, blah blah etc. It's just a shame that they've arrived at that number. 276bhp conjures images of rear-wheel drive Oriental street-racers. A Vauxhall Astra just shouldn't have 276bhp. At least, not one with a warranty and a service plan.